How To Be A Positive Thinker and Doer in the New Year — and Beyond!
I’ve written about this before and I’ll write about it again today, and probably, I’ll write about again at some tomorrow in the future:
Whatever you focus on, expands. So, just be sure you focus on the positive, and not the negative. Because if you focus on the negative, things get worse. But if you focus on the positive, things get better.
That’s just an unspoken law of the universe.
No way around it.
Now, that isn’t to say that I don’t have bad days. Or that I don’t make mistakes. Or that I don’t swear. Or that I think I’m Jesus, Buddha, Moses, or Mr. Spock, or just plain holier than thou.
Please. Couldn’t be farther from the truth.
I’m just a guy trying to do the best he can, if while hopefully, somehow, someway bringing a little light into the world, with my work, my ways, and my thoughts.
But again: let me be clear:
I am flawed, but I always try to keep myself in check.
If I stub my toe, I might swear. If I am derailed in traffic in an unguarded moment, I might curse.
However, I try not to swear on a regular basis.
I am not a common human being, so I don’t use or speak with common street words on any daily basis. I am an educated individual, so I leave the frequent profanities to the less dignified. And I certainly don’t consciously or directly insert any ignorant or vulgar language into my writings, be they articles, essays, blogs, books, or scripts just for the heck of it, or just because I can.
I have more respect than that for my work — and especially for my readers.
But that’s me. And in the world of creative expression and freedom, people should be able to talk or write or relate or communicate any way they so deem.
But just in case you’re wondering if positive or “rosy” outlooks and thoughts (in life, writing, on social media and otherwise) make a difference…here’s some proof that they do. A dear friend recently sent me this message which I post here with their permission:
“Just wanted to let you know how your consistent, thoughtful commentary has inspired me today, and how I was rewarded for it.
My most favorite Starbucks has a very weird drive-thru entrance and when I got there this morning two separate people had lined up in the wrong lane to get into the drive-thru. I pulled around to the correct lane which enabled me to cut in front of them in the line.
I admit I was frustrated, I wanted my coffee but then thought about how rude it would be to cut the line.
So the line moves, and I wait, and the gentleman in the wrong lane looked at me, surprised, and then moved up. When the line moved again I let the lady behind him get in front of me as well.
When I get to where I pick up my coffee I find out that the lady in front of me had paid for it. I will be honest, I had no expectation of this but I was grateful for it.
As I was leaving with my coffee I thought about how much different the situation would have been if I had just cut in front of them. It could have caused anger, bad feelings, possible argument, and potentially ruined all three of our days.
By taking the ‘Herbie J route’ and just being kind, everybody got what they needed even if it wasn’t as quickly as they would have liked, and everybody left Starbucks feeling a little bit better about themselves and each other than they did when they pulled in.
Herbie J knows what he’s talking about with this kindness stuff.”
Isn’t that nice?
I thought so. It touched me so much when I first read that note. It really made me feel wonderful, and like I was making a difference.
Look it: We all have problems. We all have challenges. And we live in a broken world, and it’s never going to be fixed. We can hope so. We can pray so. But the truth is the world is pretty much 70% darkness and 30% light.
Those who are positive are already facing an uphill battle. The odds are against us from the get-go. And it seems like things are getting worse.
But even though we can’t eliminate the darkness. We can definitely at least help to keep it from spreading.
And we do that in a few subtle and direct ways, going through the front and back door along the way.
Firstly, never let anyone make you feel like you’re the only one who makes mistakes.
To reiterate: We all make mistakes.
Never let anyone make you feel anything less than positive and joyful.
Do not allow the martyrdom or false guilt of others to convince you otherwise.
And here’s a biggie:
Stay away from bullies.
Do not allow passive-aggressive individuals in your life who manipulate you into doing their bidding by seducing you with false kindness, false joyful words, and money — just to suit their needs.
If you have only the best of intentions in mind, healthy, strong-minded, good intentions — and if there are those who fail to see that, then let them go. It is not your problem they are unhappy — it is their problem…especially if they are not smart enough to hear the wisdom of your joyful, positive insight.
Here’s a personal story from my youth to help drive this point home:
When I was in high school, I didn’t have much confidence. I was athletic and played sports on the city streets of my neighborhood growing up in Rochester, New York. But I couldn’t get it together to play organized sports in high school. Probably because I was bullied a lot, which clearly was not encouraging behavior by my peers. So, I retreated from such activities, although I regret it today. I could have easily played baseball, soccer, tennis; joined the swimming team — or boxed. I was good at all of those sports.
But because I lacked confidence, and because of the bullying…I didn’t pursue any of that, sadly. And as I look back now, I really don’t even know how I made it through every day. It was tough.
But when I would get bullied, I used to think “Now, why would that mean dude who is so talented…so blessed with grace and ability in football…or baseball…or basketball…whatever it was…why would that individual be so mean and so cruel to me and others who were not as blessed?”
I just never understood it…bullying…and I never really will.
With that said, I have long forgiven those who bullied me in high school. And while I still get bullied today, for one reason or another (if you can believe it!), I feel compelled to forgive those present attacks as well. (Even though I truly still don’t understand those who continue to behave this way.)
I guess, whenever we really bullied, then or now, we always have to consider the source — and if anything, I have learned not to allow any of that to hold me back today — from being and doing all I was born to be and do!
And if you’re having issues with bullies, you should apply the same strategy…by being positive and smiling…and by following a few more positive steps in the right direction:
- Surround yourself only with people who appreciate your positive view and bright light and shiny way of living.
- Surround yourself only with positive, uplifting, loving-kind people.
- Surround yourself only with people who have your best interests in mind.
- Surround yourself only with people who speak joyfully of you, and others.
- Surround yourself only with people who are healthy-minded, even in the midst of what may be their own infirmity.
- Stay away from those who hurt you or abuse you in any way, physically, verbally, psychologically or emotionally.
- Stay away from those who constantly curse, or use vulgar words.
- Stay away from those who do not believe in any good Universal being or essence who runs the Universe, and/or those who do not believe in Love.
- Live your life joyfully and surround yourself only with those who appreciate that joy, and whatever wisdom you profess in any area of life.
If you espouse to be healthy, and you seek only all to be healthy, and if there are others who do not see or appreciate any of your wisdom, kindness, or insight…and if they seek only seek to be self-destructive, mean-spirited and unhappy…then let them be — and let them go.
Simply bless everyone, even those who do not have your wisdom of Love.
Just live your life joyfully, while blessing on their way others who seek a different path.
Love and forgive all of those who hurt you, while knowing, too, that just because you love and forgive them, that doesn’t mean they have to be in your life. You can still love people from afar, and just leave them be.
Just present your wisdom of Love and Health as best you can, and surround yourself with those who are smart enough to see your Love, and let go of everyone else who doesn’t.
Just be happy, share your Love, “let it rest where Jesus flung it,” as they say, and if it doesn’t stick, then just move on — joyfully — for the highest good of all concerned!
Happy New Year, Everybody!
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